Concerns about someone else

Partners, parents, (grand)children, friends

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When someone you love gambles, it can raise many questions, concerns, and emotions. You may feel powerless, angry, sad, or confused, and that’s completely understandable. Whether it involves your partner, parent, or child: a gambling problem affects your relationship and your daily life. On this page, you will find recognition, explanations, and practical tips. You will learn how to deal with the situation and why it’s important to continue taking good care of yourself as well.

If someone close to you is struggling with gambling, this can put you in a difficult situation too. We’re here to support you. You can contact us free of charge and anonymously via our helplines.

Stichting Naast is there for the loved ones of people with an addiction. On their website, ‘Help, my loved one has an addiction’, you can find advice and information, and ask for help.

This information is for people whose partner has a gambling problem. Do you recognize yourself in one of these situations?

  • You have just discovered that your partner gambles.
  • Your partner gambles and lies about it.
  • Your partner has lost a lot of money after a period of gambling.
  • Your partner has started gambling again after a period of stopping.
  • You are looking for help for your partner.
  • You are looking for help for yourself to cope with this.
     

This information is for children whose parent has a gambling problem. Do you recognize yourself in the following situations?

  • You have just discovered that one of your parents gambles.
  • Your father/mother gambles and lies about it.
  • You have discovered that your father/mother is gambling again after a period of stopping.
  • You are looking for help for your father/mother.
  • You are looking for help for yourself to cope with this.
     

This information is for parents and/or caregivers of a child with a gambling problem. Do you recognize yourself in one of these situations?

  • You have discovered that your child gambles.
  • Your child gambles and you doubt whether this is a problem.
  • You see that (large) amounts are being debited from your child’s account by gambling companies and/or gambling websites.
  • Your child does not allow you to view his/her bank account.
  • Your child regularly lies about his or her gambling behavior.
  • Your child is gambling again.
     

This information is for grandparents of a child with a gambling problem. Do any of these situations sound familiar to you?

  • You have discovered that your grandchild is gambling.
  • Your grandchild is gambling and you’re not sure whether this is a problem.
  • Your grandchild has started gambling again.
  • Your grandchild has lost a lot of money after a period of gambling.
  • You are looking for help for your grandchild.
  • You want to help your grandchild, but you don’t know how.
     

This information is for people whose friend has a gambling problem. Do you recognize yourself in one of these situations?

  • You have just discovered that a friend gambles.
  • Your friend gambles and lies about it.
  • Your friend has lost a lot of money after a period of gambling.
  • Your friend has started gambling again after a period of stopping.
  • You are looking for help for your friend.
  • You are looking for help for yourself to cope with this.
     

Signals for loved ones

“A person may show one or more signs. The signs can also change if gambling behaviour increases. These signs may indicate a gambling problem, but they do not have to. Something else could be going on. That’s why it’s always important to talk to the person.”

– Helder op school

Signals for loved ones

Behaviour
  • Lying
  • Cheating
  • Mysterious
  • Change in habits
  • Increasing screen time
  • Absent from school or work
  • Not open about finances
  • Talking a lot about sports
  • Obsession with money (earning)
  • Do not open their mail
  • Untidy appearance
Social
  • Withdrawing
  • Mentally and physically absent
  • Neglecting hobbies
  • Relationship problems
  • Tensions in the family
  • New circle of friends
Emotional
  • Stress
  • Sad
  • Restless
  • Irritable
  • Mood swings
  • Unexplained joy
  • Unexplained anger
  • Tense before sports events
Practical
  • Money disappears
  • Borrowing money
  • Money problems
  • Gambling apps
  • Gambling sites
  • Visits to casinos
  • Strange transfers
  • Cash
  • Empty savings account
  • Not doing fun things
  • (Suddenly) possessing a lot of money